What It Means To Be Quietly Confident

Daily Thoughts

tumblr_ncrzsvHAz41qbilh4o2_1280.jpgThere’s a misconception that confidence means being an extrovert, being loud, openly expressive and outgoing. There is this image of someone who is likable, energetic and gets a long with everyone. However, confidence means having faith in yourself or someone else. It’s the state of feeling certain about the truth of something. There is this idea that only extroverts can be truly confident, yet there are many misconceptions about introverts that can cause this thought. Confidence is something you create within yourself, it’s not something you’re born with.

I found this answer from Quora, and appreciate it so much. As an introvert, I’ve grown up being told (even til today), that I need to be more confident. As someone who is comfortable in their own skin, there’s often a mistake of equating confidence with being loud. The words “Nothing is ever as it seems, especially when it comes to people,” that she wrote is extremely true. We can never truly judge a book by its cover, especially when we only see the external parts of people. I may be a more soft spoken person, but I feel confident in being myself.

Confidence isn’t about being noticed. True confidence is believing in your abilities as an individual. It means staying strong to your values. Being quietly confident means you aren’t afraid to speak up for what you believe in. It means being able to differentiate constructive criticism and judgment, and which ones to take on and which to let go. It means you know that you will make mistakes, but you will keep trying. A person who is quietly confident, doesn’t feel the need to validate themselves to others. They don’t feel the need to tell everyone about their achievements, and they’re not afraid to tell other people about their failures.

Very often quiet people are underestimated and overlooked, with no acknowledgement of their achievements. They don’t tend to tell many people, and may come off as unsocial and may seem distant at times. The thing is when someone is quiet, it doesn’t mean they are less confident. Confidence is very much an internal feeling of self assurance. There are quiet people who may love conversing with others, and there may be those who are more loud who need time to spend with themselves. Everyone is different. We all express ourselves in different ways.

It’s easy to create an idea of what an individual may be like with labels such as introvert, shy or quiet, but I find that narrows down the ability to truly get to know someone. Some people take more time to open up than others. I’ve been told by people to be more loud. A part of me wants to say that my personality doesn’t mean I can’t be confident, it simply means I show it in a different way. There are many extroverts labeled as confident, but confidence isn’t based on a personality type.

As an individual, I’m not afraid to ask questions, and this is something I feel quietly confident with. Many quiet people are highly observant and analytical. They know how to determine a situation, and some people are able to read what others may be feeling. They tend to think before they speak. Those who speak the most or talk the loudest, doesn’t mean they always have the most substantial things to say. Our personality doesn’t determine our intelligence or our abilities.

I consider myself quite a talkative person, when I’m having a engaging conversation that interests me or makes me thoughtful. I feel a quiet confidence, because I don’t feel the need to alter myself to a loud person in order to be similar to how others may express confidence. When we don’t say anything, it doesn’t mean that we don’t know, we’re clueless or we’re not interested. It may mean we’re thinking deeply or listening carefully. There are certain things that don’t always need to be said out loud.

There is this common thought, that those who are loud are strong, and those who are quiet are weak. These are all from the way things look, rather than what they are. It’s the way it appears, but not often what it may be. There are many quiet people who have achieved great things in the world. They have a sense of self acceptance. We should embrace our strengths and qualities of ourselves, the way we wouldn’t change the accent we have, we shouldn’t need to change our personality to please others.

What I feel is that those who lack self confidence, are those who feel the need to fill the silence every second. They are uncomfortable in sitting in silence. Then it doesn’t feel raw and real, because there is this discomfort that they may feel in feeling quiet in the presence of others. Confidence means embracing yourself and being sure of your decisions. It’s not something that can be worn, but an attitude of being comfortable in who you are as a person. It means not being afraid to make mistakes and learning from them and being true to yourself.

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How Exercise Can Boost Your Self Confidence

Daily Thoughts

flowers.jpgExercise has endless benefits for your body, mind and soul. It is essential for good health and has a significant affect on ones emotions. I remember going to the doctors this year to discuss my anxiety. The question that was always asked was “Are you exercising?”. This question is always asked by the ones close to me. I think that alone shows how much exercise is a way of showing our body self love and care. From exercising regularly, I have felt such a positive change towards my anxiety and my self confidence. If one feels depressed or anxious, gentle exercise can allow the mind to flow better. Exercise should be about aiming to feel good in your body and mind. I don’t believe there is a perfect body, but exercise has made me feel a far deeper appreciation for my body and having good health.

1. It makes you appreciate having a healthy body. I went through a period of time where I felt very depressed, and no matter how much my loved ones were encouraging me to exercise, I didn’t. My health went down and I got sick very easily, which in contrast shows how precious it is to treasure a healthy body.

2. Exercising encourages you to eat and drink well. I found that when I started to exercise regularly, I drink more water and I eat healthier. My body craves healthy and nourishing foods.

3. You feel motivated and far more energetic to live life. If you have ever been through depression, you will understand the feeling of being extremely unmotivated. Embracing exercise can create a routine in your life and give you the energy you need to be more productive. It lifts your mood and strengthens your body.

4. Being less likely to think negatively of your body. I feel that we are all accused of thinking negatively of our body in some way, big or small. A common thought is the wish that we could lose weight. I believe that when you start giving your body what it needs, you are doing the best you can. Naturally the negative thoughts will lessen.

5. Self confidence actually comes from feeling good, rather than ‘looking’ good. There is too much emphasis on looking good when it comes to exercise, that it can often create a negative mind set. It’s not necessarily bad to want to look a certain way, but it’s the way of going about it that can become unhealthy for some. When you make the connection with physical health and endurance, and feed your body the fuel it needs, you will naturally feel good in your skin.

6. Your emotional, mental and physical health. Exercise releases endorphin’s. It gives you clarity in the mind when you’re stressed compared to feeling anxious while sitting on the couch. Your body feels stronger and stronger over time when you exercise regularly. Your mind feels more peace when dealing with stressful situations and your emotions will be more balanced.

7. You will no longer have the thought “I should go exercise…” The feeling of accomplishment no longer gives you the thoughts of having to exercise. I really know that feeling of dragging my legs to the gym at first. But after the first few times, it becomes an enjoyable routine/habit that I look forward to. A few years back, I felt extremely self conscious of my body image, I constantly felt the thoughts going inside of me telling me to lose weight.

It was extremely unhealthy, as I was already underweight during that time. I made myself feel very guilty if I hadn’t exercised that day. No one should feel guilty if they miss a day, nor should they develop an unhealthy state of mind towards exercise. This is the perfect example of showing how being ‘skinny’ won’t make you happy.

8. Stress melts away far more easily compared to no exercising. When I think back to the days where I felt a lack of self confidence in my body image, I realised how much that would then roll towards other parts of myself. The body and mind are all connected. When you feel bad about your body, you may start feeling bad about other things in your life, and the build up of stress can affect your overall health.

Exercise is an act of self love. Treat your body with the love that it deserves. No matter if it’s a simple walk outside or a run at the gym, your body will thank you for it. Remember that self confidence comes from feeling good. It is the positive self talk we have within ourselves, that reminds us that although we are not perfect, we have the ability to achieve great things.

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