Words Of Wisdom I Learned This Month

8a6cbdac079742ea1fb3cf0d0caa8a4a (1)It’s been a wonderful month filled with lots of lessons, changes and experiences. I’m so grateful for the people in my life and the words of wisdom that I’ve heard this month, and I really want to share some of these with you. I’ve seen more cats this month than I’ve seen since going to the cat cafe, which makes anyone who loves those furry creatures feel happy inside. Curiously enough, I’ve also seen many dachshunds than I’ve ever seen before, from a beautiful smooth short haired brown dachshund to several long haired black and brown dachshunds.

Accept yourself, be patient and change what you can. I was at an event this month and someone said to me “You need to be more outgoing”. I realised that I am just naturally a calm person, and being outgoing and energetic is something you can’t force. We should accept what is our personality. If you’re soft spoken, gentle and calm, just embrace it. If you’re not happy with something, then change it. If you can’t change it, accept it. There have been certain situations I haven’t been happy in, but knowing that I can change the situation is great.

Happiness depends on only yourself. I was talking to a family friend and I talked about how I went to the counselor a few times this year. We talked about how the counselor is there to provide reflection and advice, but it’s our choice to accept it and take action. No one else can fix all our problems, make us feel a sense of calm and feel happiness within, except for ourselves. We can feel happy with other people, but if we depend our happiness on others, we lose the ability to be satisfied in our own company. True happiness can only come from yourself.

Learn independence as early as possible. It’s okay to ask for help, just as much as it’s important for us to help others when we can. However, when we learn to do things ourselves, we don’t rely on others to complete things and it makes us more independent and responsible for ourselves. Independence makes us more likely to feel comfortable in doing things alone. It makes us more capable of doing more things on our own and helps us learn more about what we’re like as an individual. Being independent makes us learn certain things sooner, rather than later.

Good relationships and spending time alone are so important. The people we surround ourselves with influence us to some degree, even if it’s just a little. You don’t need a lot of friends, but having a few quality friends is a true gift. I really believe that surrounding yourself with people that have similar values as you makes a huge difference. Friends should be encouraging, honest and comfortable to be around. Spending time alone is just as important as interacting with others, because knowing how to enjoy your own company reminds us how we are our own company for the rest of our life.

You can listen to advice but it’s your choice whether to accept it. Everyone gives advice, and some are better than others. It’s our choice whether to take it or leave it. There have been times where I listen to advice, but I’ll end up not taking the advice. Sometimes it doesn’t feel right, or I don’t agree with it. There are advice that are given because people genuinely care and are also sharing advice from their own life experience. They mean well for you. Whereas there is also advice that isn’t beneficial and don’t lead to good results.

Be yourself, don’t compare and know that no one is the same. There is no one just like you. It sounds silly but this month in particular, I’ve been scared of gaining any weight. However, no one is the same and we’re all different shapes and sizes. It’s terrible to compare and the main focus should be on living a healthy lifestyle. Comparing with someone else doesn’t make anyone feel better. Being yourself is the ultimate motto we should live each day. Learning the fine art of not giving a fudge, will make us more happy and relaxed.

Send blessings and gratitude towards others. This is something I try to do when I’m walking in the city or at a park. Be thankful for the birds, trees, the wind, blue sky and the sun. The moon at night, the people around me and sending good thoughts to strangers. We should try our best to do this for those we know and only wish the best for them. Everyone deserves to feel happiness, contentment or a sense of peace in their life. Appreciation for nature and a reminder of how big the universe is, makes us realise that our worries are so small.

A really important reminder I want to share is that no one is perfect. There isn’t a day where we aren’t learning. Learning the art of letting go means that we don’t hold onto things that simply hurt us. Life is a balance, which is to say, we can’t be laughing and smiling all the time, but we can learn how to have peace within ourselves. Treat yourself the way you would to a dear friend, because sometimes we can be a lot harsher on ourselves than anyone. Thinking about the past or wanderings about the future too much won’t help us live in the moment. The only moment we truly have is this one right now.

What are some words of wisdom that you’ve learned this month?

Photographed by Leo Fuchs while filming The Nun’s Story, 1958


  1. Such a beautiful post. When I am going through a bad time I always tell myself that one day everything is going to be okay. It wasn’t until this month that someone reminded me that I am the only person to define when that ”one day” is going to be. Loved this, it really made me think of a lot of things.
    wishing you an even better month than the one that’s ending
    Elena xx

    | https://plieoutsidethebox.wordpress.com |

  2. Very wise words, Katie. I agree that you can’t force yourself to be something that you’re not. Like you, I am not that talkative and people have always said to me to talk more. It is annoying but taking more and talking loudly is just not me, and I am happy to accept that. Also alone time is very important to me, and I am lucky to have friends that understand that I need my own space a lot of the time. That’s not to say I don’t think about others. I do, and offer to help them whenever I can – right after we take care of ourselves first so we feel right, feel good and ready to share what we can share.

  3. Thank you Mabel. I read this great post from Jenn from Introvert, Dear. I really want to share a bit of it with you:

    I’ve always felt at home in silence. I’ve always craved a bedroom with a closed door more than the “fun” of a crowd and their empty chatter…Our society doesn’t understand or accept the introvert’s way. We’re supposed to be outgoing, quick-thinking, and always on the go. There’s no time for rest and reflection. To be alone is to be a “bad friend” or a “selfish spouse.” To stay home on a Saturday night is to commit social suicide.
    That’s why I wrote “The Secret Lives of Introverts.” It’s time for the introvert’s way to stop being seen as “less than.” It’s time for introverts to feel comfortable being who they are.

    We all express care in our own ways. I thought what she said really resonated with me, and I’m sure many parts resonate with you and many other people too.

  4. I love your mindset, and I always find what a funny coincidence it is that the topics of your posts are oftentimes the topics that I’ve been thinking about the most lately.
    I’m in my first semester at college right now, and though I need to spend a lot of time outside class studying/doing homework (my classes are hella hard, at least for me, this semester), being surrounded by so many people makes me feel like I should be spending more time socializing and such. But then I remember that I don’t need to do anything that doesn’t feel right to me, even if everyone around me is doing it. Aand I’ve also gained some weight since coming to college in June xD which I’m also learning to accept and manage.

    1. Thank you, and oh wow, that’s quite lovely, we must be having similar thoughts on certain topics sometimes. Very true, do what feels right for you! It’s always good to balance both, but I know what you mean especially when there’s lots of study to do. May I ask what you are studying? :) Glad I’m not the only one, I think it’s one of those things that happen to some of us especially first year of uni!

      1. I intend to double major in Psychology and Cognitive Science! My uni also has Mandarin classes for Chinese speakers (so, people who can only speak but not read/write Chinese), so I’m also taking Chinese classes for my first 2 years or so.

  5. Wow..this is so beautifully written and I absolutely adore both your blog and your attitude towards life. The point about accepting who you are is so important in my life – instead of trying to become a super charismatic extrovert, putting pressure on myself to be outgoing, funny and loud I’ve accepted that I will always be quite a calm/conservative person and this is something to embrace rather than be ashamed of. I’ve been spending a lot of time reconnecting with the earth/ the people around me as a means of accepting my own place within them and it has felt wonderful, so I am hoping this sort of mindfulness will stick with me for life..hope you are having a wonderful weekend xox

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