The Importance Of Not Judging A Book By Its Cover

823ac557f14dd4effb75412ef822cbc6.jpgWe live in a society where many people judge and treat others based on their looks. Have you ever had an experience talking to someone, and then felt that they spoke differently with another person beside you. Perhaps the tone in their voice changes, the eyes look more engaged and various other signs that are a giveaway. I previously wrote about how we live in a shallow world and how to stay true to yourself in a superficial world. Whether it is in friendship or any relationship, we always meet people first by seeing the way they look, before sinking deeper into their personality. There is a concept that people who are considered more attractive are more trustworthy and likely to be successful.

Although, I could write about many different examples, Appearances will always be valued at various degrees. I still feel that it is very shallow and unreasonable to compare someones self worth with the way they look. In hoping to not contradict myself, I do want to write about it from both point of views. Everyone has such different personalities and beauties within that can be seen if given the time to get to know them. Another aspect is the different experiences we have all been through. No matter how much we perceive someone visually, we cannot imagine or judge what they have been through. It’s only when we speak, listen, give our time and engage, that we can understand.

When I wrote about what really matters in the world, I genuinely believe that the world needs more kindness, love and compassion. I believe that the most important thing at the end of the day is the relationships we have with people. Yet, with most people we barely scratch the surface. We walk around past thousands of strangers in our life time. Judgement of a film, book or a person before giving them a chance, can make a person lose the chance of possibly unfolding and diving into a wonderful story or friendship. Perhaps the reason why people judge, is because there is an assumption that if we feel someone is unattractive or attractive, it will be connected to positive or negative traits they may possess.

I previously wrote about why I deleted my personal Facebook, and in many aspects I felt that having a Facebook with hundreds of primary, high school and university friends and acquaintances started to feel like many people used it solely to judge others. Whether it was what they currently look like now, what someone did on a Friday night, what job they have and so on. I now have a private Facebook with literally 5 people, who are family members that I message. As much as I try not to judge, I am someone who is a more ‘keep to myself’ sort of person, where most of those thoughts tend to stay in my head. But I think there is an importance in what we speak that should be considered, whether it’s kind, constructive or necessary.

Although, I have been speaking strongly about not judging a book by the cover, it’s only fair to see it from both sides of the coin. There are many times where small situations may cause us to judge by the cover. For example, I noticed that I get asked a lot for directions or asked to take photos for tourists. I generally have a friendly face, I don’t use my phone on the streets, I’m generally very aware of my surroundings and seem more approachable to some people. Maybe it’s a good thing and maybe it’s not. There are certain situations that causes us to naturally judge someone by their appearances. We may judge ones appearances for our safety at night time or a persons outfit for an interview. There is a difference between fair judgment and condemnation.

In terms of body image, we tend to judge a bigger body in leaning towards the unhealthy side and a slender figure with a healthy body. Whereas, that may not necessarily be the case, as body image does not determine inner health. The truth is people will always judge. When you walk down the streets, people aren’t able to see your wonderful humour, great personality or way of speaking. The important thing to remember as an individual, is to stay true to yourself. When we get caught up with the world, it can be quick to be absorbed into the superficiality. Remember to stay grounded, honest, true and focused on what is really important in life.

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9 thoughts on “The Importance Of Not Judging A Book By Its Cover

  1. So true, Katie – “the world needs more kindness, love and compassion.” Also, kudos on giving up on social media when you realise what it is used for. I live very far away from my high school and college classmates and even former colleagues. I am very glad that they have no way of following me around or staying in touch (to make notes). I had a conversation on the phone with an old classmate recently, and the first question was – “so, did you get fat?” It was so degrading, I had to ask him to not call me again. Truly shameful the way we see people – as grist for the ridicule mill.

    1. Thank you for your comment. I am glad you agree. I can’t say I have 100% given up on Facebook, but I only use it now to keep in touch with family. I’m sorry to hear the conversation you had with an old classmate went in such a bad direction.

      It’s awful that anyone would ask that as a first question. I feel that often there is a smaller group of people that truly care for us compared to the many who just want to (as you said) make notes.

      Wishing you a much brighter and lovelier conversation with someone after that call! X

  2. How sadly true
    Our society seems to be going downhill in more ways than one
    Social media and how wrongly it’s been used today is I topic I personally hammer on very often to anyone willing to listen.
    It’s just so suffocating and exhaustingr
    Too many people just seem to derive some sort of satisfaction from passing around such negative energy, comparing, belittling and being rather unfair.

    1. I feel that with everything there are the pros and cons, and that’s really prevalent with Social Media. On one hand, it’s such a great way to spread positive messages and awareness, and on the other hand it can be used in many negative ways. Thank you for your comment!

  3. Great post Katie. This topic has got me thinking…
    I used to care more, much more about how I appeared to others when I had a red birth mark on my face. In my late teen, I had it covered by make-up and in my 20s, I slowly had it removed by having laser treatment. Because of that birth mark, I was always worried about how I was going to be received by the world; by others. After the treatment, I felt like I had finally been set free from being so self-conscious.
    Yes I was hurt by other people’s judgement, even though they didn’t say it on my face, but I was so sensitive that I knew that they felt sorry to me.

    Just want to share my story with you and your readers.

    Viv X

    1. Thank you so much for sharing your story.

      It made me think of one of my dear friends who has a birth mark on her face, and she is one of the most beautiful people I know. Although I cannot relate completely, I felt that way with my teeth throughout high school and university. I tried not to show my teeth too often, and it stopped from just enjoying life and laughing without worrying what I’d look like. Now that I have braces, I actually smile a lot more in them.

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